I spent the last week gloriously with Emily and McGee as they prepared to get married. I'm glad to say their hitching went off with only a few hitches, like the fact that I failed in my prime duty as maid of honor and left McGee's wedding band sitting on the kitchen table until after the wedding. I could spend pages and pages on hilarious stories about the week, but I'll leave that to Emily when they get back from their honeymoon.
An odd week, and a good week, filled with late nights and active mornings and much shopping and cutting and hemming and talking and shooing Mr. Shaw away from the Jordan almonds which were almost entirely ignored at the reception anyway. The wedding and reception themselves, and the brunch the next day, were entirely good and happy. I lived with Emily's family for a year once and I love catching up with her parents and her beautiful Grandma Scotty, who welcomes me almost as her own. She always likes to hear me play the piano if I get a chance, and I was so ashamed that I couldn't remember the whole of any piece to give her in decent shape since I haven't been practicing regularly.
That, and some other passing incidents, began a long and complicated process which I can hardly define in my own mind. I come away from the past week with a dissatisfaction with myself - a need to stop coasting and start accelerating. It took a while to get used to the demands of my job, but I hadn't realized how lax I've been now that the first crunch is long past. I need to spend time praying. I called my dear friend Rachel last night to discuss it, and we ended up meeting for lunch today, praying together in a small park downtown while shooing wasps away. I had also met with my other dear friend Steph who gave me good counsel over breakfast. A good friend that pulls you upward is worth more than anything, and I am rich in them!
I was aching at new knowledge of my inadequacies last night as I prepared for bed, and as I flipped toward my current reading in 1st Timothy, something in Job caught my eye. Wisdom, Job said, is nowhere to be found by man. God had to find the way to it and tell us. I'm familiar with the verse that says that the fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom, but reading the whole context freshly reminded me that wisdom isn't even anything I can define or search out for myself. There is no way around immersing myself in the Lord if I want to live a worthwhile life of bringing wisdom, firm grace, truth, and mercy - all in real love - to others.
And all that, of course, is nothing new, not to any of us. But I always forget it. I don't know how many times I've had to be painfully taught it. Please remind me, when you see me.
Oh, life is a wonderful thing!
Posted by tuggy at 10.26.04 19:08I wish I'd known about the jordanian almonds. they add a sense of completion to weddings.
Posted by: linnea at 10.28.04 15:58